The Music Tank

I’m a busy man! So straight into it!

TESTING MY CODING SKILLS, OR LACK THEREOF

Alright, if this works right, you’ll see the bitching video of Justice’s “Stress” which you would have seen already if you weren’t a n00b and read the Overground Sewer! If this doesn’t work, just skip to the next article.

SPEAKING OF OVERGROUND SEWER

Did you read it? Why not! Go read it. Enlighten yourself.

SPEAKING OF HALF BAKED

I’m having a hard time making fun of him this week. He gave me birthday well wishings and complemented STF, so he gets a free pass. This week.

TORN

From Blabbermouth:

Pearl Jam has begun work on a new album, which will be the follow up to 2006’s self titled release.

According to Billboard.com, the band is currently laying down four or five songs for its ninth studio album. The guys are teaming up with longtime producer Brendan O’Brien for the first time since 1998. O’Brien is known for taking a short amount of time in the studio.

The band is heading out on a short tour of the East Coast starting on June 11th.

I’m torn because I really wanted to put this under “Hang It Up Already” except I don’t have a real problem with Pearl Jam. Not a fan, but the video for “Do The Evolution” was cool. Now that I’ve got this coding thing under control, why don’t I put that video in too?

Booyah.

TOO MUCH HYPE

From Music News:

Courtney Love checked herself into an LA hospital complaining of throat and chest pains this past weekend.

Love checked into Cedars Sinai hospital around 3 am Friday. A spokesperson for the troubled rock star confirmed to TMZ.com that the singer was diagnosed with ’strep throat’, a condition that usually requires nothing more than a course of antibiotics.

An onlookers also reported that on leaving the hospital, Courtney stopped off at a petrol station to buy cigarettes.

You know what the headline for this was? “Courtney Love Hospitalized”. I only clicked because I thought it was going to be exciting, like she got clotheslined off a motorbike or something.

WHO’S YOUR LAWYER?

From AP:

Pete Doherty was released from a London jail Tuesday after serving a partial sentence for breaking his probation. Doherty had served 29 days of a 14-week sentence. It wasn’t immediately clear why he was released early.

Doherty’s drug use has frequently landed him in court. Last year, he pleaded guilty to possession of crack cocaine, heroin, ketamine and cannabis, as well as a variety of driving offenses. His recent jail sentence came after the singer was reportedly late for several probation appointments.

Get me that lawyer! I want to do something awful enough to warrant probation and then get out early! I’d be infamous! I can even start a crappy band just like Pete!

WASN’T ME

From Music News:

Leon Hendrix, Jimi’s younger brother, has issued a statement claiming that the recently revealed sex tape of the guitar hero was a fake.

“The person in that film is not Jimi from what I have heard,” said Leon. “Yes, he had many female fans during that time and some may have been filmed. But this one is not Jimi Hendrix.”

Experience Hendrix, who control rights to Jimi Hendrix’s music and likeness, also questioned the tape’s authenticity, “We view the release as nothing more than a callous attempt to trade on the image and reputation of a deceased artist who is unable to defend himself against such an outrageous and baseless assertion.”
I don’t know, would Vivid just get bored and go “Hey, let’s get some Hendrix look alike and make a porn with him!” I had a witty follow up for that, but it escaped me.

LONG LIVE THE POLICE

From Billboard:

At a press conference today in NYC’s Time Square, The Police and Mayor Michael Bloomberg announced that the band will be playing their last concert ever in New York in August.

The date, place, and time have not been confirmed yet. However, the concert will be a fundraiser with proceeds benefiting the production of arts programming for public television stations Thirteen/WNET and WLIW New York.

Additionally, Sting and the Police announced that they will contribute $1 million to Mayor Bloomberg’s MillionTreesNYC initiative — a gift the city will match — to plant trees all over New York City.

“Some people may be surprised to know that the greatest single contribution to greenhouse gases is deforestation. We all want cleaner and cooler air, and planting trees is the best way to achieve that,” Police frontman Sting said.

The band is in the midst of the final leg of their reunion tour, which kicked off May 1 in Ottawa, the first of about 50 shows taking place this summer in amphitheaters, arenas and stadiums primarily in North America and Europe.

I’ve got nothing. I’ll miss you Sting and company!

NOEL! NOEL! HATE US NEXT! PLEASE? WE NEED THE PRESS!

From Music News:

James Blunt has been the target of Oasis loud mouth Noel Gallagher a lot recently, with Noel recently claiming that he has had to offer his Spanish house up for sale just because of it’s close proximity to Blunt’s residence.

While Blunt was in Australia on a recent tour, he was asked if this was in fact true, to which he replied “It’s Noel Gallagher’s job to say something to get in the press, he does it so very well.”

We should start a pool to see who he starts hating next. Any takers?

AMY WINEHOUSE REPORT

• Perez Hilton.com reported that Amy was arrested for possesion last week.
• There were photos of Amy in a bikini made of rags. I won’t post it. You’re welcome.

HANG IT UP ALREADY

The PRP gives me my fodder!

Rumors abound that Limp Bizkit are planning a ‘comeback tour’ of sorts without guitarist Wes Borland in the fold. While nothing official has slipped out as of yet, the band are reportedly auditioning guitarists and are planning to start off with a string of dates in Europe.

No! Just stay dead! If I have to hear “Nookie” in a non Richard Cheese fashion again I’ll kick a baby!

IT’S A FLIPPER

From Music News:

Britney Spears is reportedly considering buying a $5.96 million mansion in Encino, Los Angeles. Spears– who was recently given back some of her visitation rights to her two sons with ex-husband Kevin Federline - viewed the five-bedroom, six-bathroom property yesterday afternoon.

The 7,300 sq ft mansion – which is not far from Kevin’s house in Tarzana - boasts vaulted ceilings, fireplaces, fountains, a spiral staircase, a Jacuzzi, a swimming pool with a spa, an indoor and outdoor dining room, a wine cellar, a family room and a designer kitchen complete with state-of-the-art stainless steel appliances.

Britney recently came under fire after allegedly trashing the $35,000-a-month mansion she rented in Malibu, California. It was claimed Britney never lived in the mansion, but held parties there, which resulted in massive damage.

The source said: “The house was left a wreck. Cigarette burns and cigarette butts were everywhere - and empty bottles of wine were strewed about the place. Most of the furniture was ruined with stains, tears or nicks. Rotting food was left in the refrigerator. Spilled wine soiled the carpets and floors. No one picked up after Britney’s dogs…”. There was also reportedly plenty of “dog poop”.

This story speaks for itself. For those of you who don’t know, to “flip” a house is to fix it up and sell it again. The title was meant to be slightly funny, but probably failed.

REMEMBER WHEN EMO WAS SORT OF COOL?

From The PRP:

According to a recent press release from Fearless Records, At The Drive-In’s “One Armed Scissor” will be featured in the upcoming new multi-platform videogame, “Guitar Hero: Aerosmith”, which will see a June 29th release date.

Well, “One Armed Scissor” was one of those songs. Too bad I won’t play through a shitty Guitar Hero game to play it.

NOT A GOOD WEEK TO BE DMX

From Music-News:

Rapper DMX was charged with speeding on Tuesday. Arizona police clocked him back on January 21st driving along the 101 near Scottsdale at a speed of 114 MPH. The speed limit was 65.

He wasn’t hard to miss. He was driving a bright yellow 1966 Chevy Nova 2. His car has a massive DMX decal across the back window. The rapper was caught on three speed cameras as he drove down the highway.

He was charged with driving on a suspended license, reckless driving, two counts of endangerment and three counts of criminal speed.

And now, some Micheal Vick-esque shit, via Reuters:

Rap star DMX was arrested on Friday on suspicion of drug possession and animal cruelty after two searches of his home allegedly turned up weapons, drugs, dog carcasses and abused pit bulls. The Maricopa County Sheriff’s Office said DMX, whose real name is Earl Simmons, initially barricaded himself in his bedroom when officers arrived at his home at 3 a.m. He eventually surrendered without offering further resistance. “We are handling this case as we would any other incident of alleged animal cruelty,” Maricopa County Attorney Andrew Thomas said in a statement. It was the second time this week DMX; on Tuesday, state police arrested him for driving at speeds as high as 114 miles per hour.

Police first raided his home in the Cave Creek community near Phoenix last August. They found 12 distressed pit bulls and three dead animals partially buried on the property as well as a number of firearms. An indictment was issued on seven counts of animal cruelty after the August raid. Police staged Friday’s raid to arrest DMX on charges from their initial investigation. This time, they also found unspecified illegal drugs and five more pit bull puppies, which they removed from the house.

DMX pleaded guilty in New Jersey to animal cruelty charges in 2002 for neglecting some 13 pit bulls, according to news reports. As part of his sentence, he was required to make a public service announcement against animal abuse.

Dear DMX,

Hire Pete’s Lawyer

Sincerely,

The Music Tank.

DAVE GROHL WORDS OF MAGIC

From Music News:

Foo Fighters’ Dave Grohl has posted an open letter urging Metallica to make a kick-ass album.

He writes: Hey, it’s Dave! Remember me? Yeah, I’m the guy that’s been listening to your band faithfully since 1983. I bought your first album Kill ‘Em All from a mail order catalogue called Under The Rainbow, I think. Actually I can’t remember. It was 1983 for Christsakes! But that album changed my life and I’ve been listening to your albums ever since (even St Anger!).

I can’t wait to hear the new shit, and no matter what you guys do I’ll always be first one at the shop waiting to hear it. I’m sure you’ll come out and blow everybody’s fuckin’ minds, because you’re fuckin’ METALLICA!

Good luck. And don’t release it until it’s kick-ass.

Yours, Dave Grohl.

P.S. Are you finished recording the drums yet?

Metallica’s new and untitled album set for an autumn release.

Dear Metallica,

Listen to the man.

Sincerely,

The Music Tank.

I’m out! I’ll leave you with another music video from TISM! Music vidoes are neat. Neat but useless. Like an exotic bottle opener.