The Music Tank

I miss my front page promo pitches. Fake tells me that they’re still there, but they’re different now. The mighty promo pitches comprimised? Dammit all!

I’d like to take a second to say that I’ve more or less given up on witty news titles on the front page. Wookie is good at doing that on his site, but I’m not very skilled. So if you see some obivous titles or see a title that isn’t so witty, forgive me.

FUCKING WRONG

What’s fucking wrong, you may ask? Well, apparently there are some that would think that Travis Barker is the best drummer in the history of drumming. They would also tell you the following video is the best drum solo ever. Well, it’s not really a solo, but you’ll get the idea.

“Come on BlackMage, that’s awesome!” No, it’s fucking wrong. While I’m sure there’s a degree of difficulty there, that doesn’t seem overly hard and it seems like he’s just hitting his kit really hard. Where’s the talent in that?

Alright, now watch the following Buddy Rich video. This video has not been sped up in any way.

Awesome. So if I hear about how awesome Travis Barker is again, Half Baked gets it.

Fuck, now I’ve got Soulja Boy Tellem stuck in my head. Gross.

POWERSLAVE?

From Blabbermouth:

“There was a strange event right in the middle of [Iron Maiden's] set [at Madison Square Garden in New York City Sunday night, June 15]. Halfway through the song ‘Powerslave’, the power died to the sound system, and Maiden were onstage with full lights, shrugging their shoulders. I was right behind the soundboard, and there was never any problem at that end. In fact, [cycling star] Lance Armstrong and [actress] Kate Hudson were standing beside the mixing board making out, which made the whole situation even weirder. Who’s the Maiden-head in that celebrity family? Anyway, obviously this was a high point of their set, and within a minute after the stalls the band produced a soccer ball on stage and began kicking it around to entertain the fans while the technical nightmare continued. After about ten minutes of silence, Bruce Dickinson picked up one of the Egyptian sarcophagi and began using it as a shield to play soccer. He was pretty good with it, too! This entire time, the lights were fine, and the soundboard was perfectly okay and didn’t appear to be reset. There was definitely no panic at the board. Suddenly and happily, Steve Harris’s galloping bass reappeared in the monitors, and the band regrouped and moved onto the next song. My friends and I were joking that this was a long-distance dedication from Sharon Osbourne, and evidently Dickinson thought the same. As soon as his mic worked, he muttered dramatically something like: ‘The revenge of Sharon…the wicked witch of the west rises again!’ Strong words, preached to a crowd of 18,000. Maiden had spent the whole night, and indeed the past two years, proving themselves leagues above the egg-throwing spat at Ozzfest 2005. Evidently, they are still sensitive to the long-reaching powers of the Sharon. Why would he even joke about that if he didn’t think it was possible?”

Irony?

DON’T MAKE ME BEG

From Billboard:

The Police’s last-ever show will be held August 7th at New York’s Madison Square Garden, with proceeds to benefit New York public television stations Thirteen/WNET and WLIW21. Tickets will only be available via donations to the station, starting June 14th.

That day, the stations will air a Police retrospective featuring new interviews with the band and vintage concert clips. Tickets range from $150 to $750, with special packages coming in between two and five grand.

The show will feature support from the B-52s.

The Police’s reunion tour began in May 2007 and was the top tour of the year at more than $212 million gross and nearly 2 million in attendance.

Anyone wishing to give away their tickets and provide lodging to a fledgling news poster of a music website can contact me at blackmage@themusictank.com. I doubt it but hey, who knows?

THE TRIUMPHANT RETURN OF AC/DC

From Billboard:

AC/DC’s next studio album will be exclusively sold at Wal-Mart stores in the US, according to a report in the Wall Street Journal. The as-yet-untitled Columbia album (produced by Brendan O’Brien) is expected this fall.

AC/DC becomes the latest veteran act to pact exclusively with the retail giant, following Garth Brooks, the Eagles and Journey. The Eagles’ Long Road Out of Eden, released last summer, has been an enormous success, having sold nearly three million copies in the United States.

This will be AC/DC’s first album in eight years, following 2000’s gold Stiff Upper Lip.

Am I the only one that laughed manically when I heard this? Come on, releasing your new album exclusively at Wal Mart? Are you afraid it wouldn’t sell to those who go to real music stores?

TRADE YOUR DRUGS FOR THINGS LIKE NOT RAPE AND CIGARETTES

First off, you didn’t catch the reference of my title, watch this.

Secondly, this comes to us from Music News:

Amy Winehouse is reportedly paying $2,000 per week to keep husband Blake Fielder-Civil safe in prison.

Winehouse pays five inmates to protect her husband from other prisoners, who have targeted him because of Amy’s fame. She is also said to be shelling out a further $2,000 to fund his drug habit while he is in remand in London’s Pentonville Prison awaiting trial for grievous bodily harm and conspiracy to pervert the course of justice.

According to a source: ‘Blake has people who look after him, and he gets crack and heroin. Amy pays for it from outside.’

I don’t think I cared so much for the Amy Winehouse related news so much as I wanted to make a Picnicface reference.

HANG IT UP ALREADY

Metallica annouced it’s new album titled “Death Magnetic” and you can preview a new track from the album here.

THANK GOD

From Team Sugar:

Gavin Rossdale says he’ll never work with his wife Gwen Stefani because it would draw unwanted attention to their private life.

He said: “It’s bad enough with the whole intrusive, paparazzi-celebrity-weird-photo life. I like mystery. The people I care the most about, whether it’s in music or films or art or whatever, I don’t really need to know anything about them. The less I know about them, the better, because then I can just have my own unfiltered image of them, and whatever they do publicly, for me, can just work its magic. When we get burdened by people at Starbucks, it just takes away from that mystery.”

Really, the title says it all. Thank God.

THE GREAT LED ZEPPELIN TEASE

From Bravewords:

As previously reported, Led Zeppelin legends Jimmy Page and John Paul Jones performed two of their classic songs (‘Ramble On’ and ‘Rock And Roll’) with Foo Fighters at Wembley Stadium last night (June 7). Embracing the occasion, Foo Fighters mainman Dave Grohl told the 86,000 strong crowd as Page and Jones joined him onstage: “Tonight this is gonna be the show that we’re gonna be talking about for the next 20 years!” It was the first time Led Zeppelin had appeared onstage since their hugely successful reunion concert in front of 22,000 fans at London’s O2 centre in December.

In an interview after that concert, Page said the band were ready to reunite and perform more live events. But he said that fans could have to wait until autumn 2009 as band members had to tie up individual projects first.

From 411mania:

Jason Bonham, the son of Led Zeppelin’s original drummer John Bonham, has said that he would tour with the band “in a heartbeat.” Bonham took over his late father’s drum seat when the band reformed for a one-off reunion show in London last year. The concert, at the O2 Arena, was watched by 20,000 fans, although over a million people registered for tickets for the event.

Since the concert, rumors have been rife as to whether the band will announce any more shows. Frontman Robert Plant is currently promoting Raising Sands, his album with Alison Krauss, on a U.S. tour.

Speaking to the BBC, Bonham said: “It’s up to them but if it was up to me, I’d love to.” He also said the reunion show was “better than I could have imagined,” said he hoped to be “put into the loop” regarding more shows. “My fingers are crossed and I would do it in a heartbeat,” he said.

And from Billboard:

Robert Plant and Alison Krauss are hoping to turn their Raising Sand into a longterm project.

“I’m in no hurry to go anywhere,” Plant said yesterday. “I want to stay very close. This is a font of knowledge, and I’m sticking as close to it as I can.”

Krauss concurred, “we’re all having a wonderful time, and I hope and I think all three of us are hoping to continue this and that it go on and on.” But she added that the duo’s association shouldn’t bring the curtain down on any of their other projects.

“That doesn’t mean we’ve lost any love for who we’ve played for and play with,” she said. “The guys in Union Station, that’s like home. So I hope to continue this and go back home, too.”

“I feel like we’re just starting to know what we can do with it,” Sand producer T Bone Burnett said. “The two of them are so incredibly good that I would hate to not continue to work with both of them.”

For the moment, Plant and Krauss are definitely working together through July 19, when the tour wraps up in Nashville (they also stop at the Bonnaroo Music Festival on Sunday). And both said that they’re enjoying the opportunity to expand and enhance their musical partnership on the road.

“I’m surprised at the varying of the performances show to show,” Krauss said. “Because of the personalities within the band, it has changed the show night to night, not only the show overall but each tune takes on a different character. Everything has its own identity from night to that. That’s very exciting for all of us.”

Plant, meanwhile, says performing the album’s rootsy music, as well as revamped versions of some Led Zeppelin songs, live has “become quite an illumination, really. What has been created with the chemistry between the three of us has its down kind of genre, really. I’m a very fortunate man. I couldn’t wish for anything better than this.”

Dear Led Zeppelin,

Just go tour already. You’ll make enough money to feed Kenya.

Sincerely,

The Music Tank.

CONVENIENT?

Atlantic Records sued two members of Stone Temple Pilots yesterday, accusing them of trying to prematurely end their recording contract with the label.

The suit claims lead singer Scott Weiland and drummer Eric Kretz have threatened to stop performing under their contract and have indicated they would like to end the agreement unless Atlantic makes significant changes.

The record company said in the suit that while Stone Temple Pilots has already delivered six albums, it wants the group to record a seventh album and deliver up to two more if Atlantic decides it wants them.

Stone Temple Pilots reunited last month for its first national tour in eight years. In late 2003, the other two members of the group, guitarist Dean DeLeo and bassist Robert DeLeo, were released by Atlantic from their recording contract as they said they wanted to pursue separate careers.

Atlantic said in the lawsuit that the group — Weiland, Kretz and the DeLeos — was now touring successfully and had indicated its intention to record together again. The record company said its contract with Stone Temple Pilots was written under New York laws and that the musicians are trying to use California laws to terminate it.

Atlantic said claims by Kretz and Weiland that they have a right to terminate the contract “have given rise to a definite, real and substantial controversy between the parties that threatens to harm Atlantic’s business.”

Atlantic is seeking a court declaration of its rights under the recording contract, the costs of its legal fees and any other relief the court decides is appropriate.

Alright, I’m not a huge STP fan, but why the hell are they getting bothered now that they’re touring again but not before they go on hiatus?

WE CAN ALL STOP WONDERING AND I CAN STOP POSTING ABOUT IT

From 411mania:

The verdict is in and R. Kelly has been found not guilty on his child pornography charges. Kelly was charged with 14 counts of videotaping himself having sex with an underage girl. He was facing a minimum of four years in prison but is a free man now.

Amen.

I leave you with a bit of awesome from Josh Homme.